Sunday, December 2, 2007

The Battle

Sarah has been planning to get to a Swedish Smorgasord since we knew we were going to Sweden. They are insanely expensive, but even more so today since this was the start of their special Christmas Smorgasbord, which carries a higher price.

I won’t tell you how much it cost, but lets just say that it was a lot more than $100 and less than $1,000. This is what Sarah wanted for her Christmas present this year.

An all-you-can-eat meal at this level requires proper preparation for battle. The best eating experience of my life was the buffet at the Bellagio in Las Vegas, where my performance there is still legendary amongst my family. It was $54 per person, and they lost a ton of money on me. Their fatal error was all-you-can-eat king crab legs in shells that have already been cracked open. With dinner this expensive however, it’s going to be a challenge.

The secret to attacking an expensive buffet is to eat a giant dinner the night before. This expands your stomach in preparation for what I call “Judgment Day.” You then skip breakfast and lunch on Judgment Day, leaving a giant, cavernous, empty stomach. Battle preparations have been made and the final hour is approaching.

1 comment:

tales_from_the_crib said...

hopes you are all yummy-ed out :)